IC - Episode 2: Air and Fire (Meepo's thread)

[Mister_Sinister]

You better be fucking honoured in my fucking presence, fuckface! Which little bitch told you that turning up on my doorstep was acceptable?

Abigor is still yelling just as loudly as he was before.

Maybe I should type him in caps? 

[Nick]

Here we go again... thinks Meepo as he takes a deep breath.

"By the grace of Lord Belial I am assured safe passage from his realm to Avernus where I have an urgent message to deliver to my Holiness Kurtulmak."

[Mister_Sinister]

"Awww, did Lord Belial give you an assurance, fucker? Well, guess what? That means fuck-all in BEL's realm. HE has not given your fucking hide any permission to come piss on his fence. If you want to walk your homesick abortion of a fucking ass through here, you need the permission of Generalissimo Bel! You don't have that permission, do you, you little bitch-whore?"

[Nick]

Meepo chooses to remain silent this time, letting Abigor's filthy tirade wash over him. Fact that he has not struck now meant that Belial did get through somewhat to Bael since Hell is still not very friendly for travellers, especially on his caliber. Silently praying to Kurtulmak, Meepo waits for timely intervention.

[Mister_Sinister]

"Well, you little shit, how about a deal? You represent your so-called 'people'? Then we can come to an arrangement."

Abigor appears less angry in his speech now, although his voice still has a volume that is far from pleasant.

[Nick]

"Let's hear the terms, but an answer you will not get from me so quickly." Meepo replies cautiously. If anything, he will let Kurtulmak make the decision, representative or not.

[Mister_Sinister]

"Well, the terms are simple. You levy 100 of your 'people' to the Blood War effort for a nine-year tour of duty, and in return, for those nine years, you can have free safe passage in Avernus. Even a complete retarded fucker like you gets these!

[Nick]

"Interesting proposition. Let me think about it and get back to you..." Meepo replies with extreme seriousness and an intense look of thoughtfulness on his face as he begins to move forward.

However, his knees begin to creak after a short distance. "Mmm...Supreme General. I know you are busy. Let's give myself a deadline to give you an answer, so let's say...the amount of time it takes to get me to Kurtulmak's realm. So if I could somehow find a way to hasten my journey there, I could give you an answer with a shorter amount of waiting. What say you?"

[Mister_Sinister]

Abigor laughs loudly, with the laughter echoing in Meepo's ears longer than it should.

"How stupid do you think I am? Do you think I'm stupid? Clearly, you MUST think I'm stupid!

With this, the laughter becomes distorted, and gradually, the entire landscape starts to shift. Then, suddenly, Meepo finds himself in front of a large and complex mine, surrounded by obelisks with Kurthulmak's holy symbol on them.

"This is the doorstep to Kurthulmak's realm. I will dispatch squads of devils to watch its every entrance. You will make the decision, or you are not leaving his realm alive and with your soul intact. Decide wisely.

With that, Abigor's voice fades away.

[Nick]

Meepo smiles and nods as he enters the mine. Abigor will get his answer when he gets out...

[Mister_Sinister]

Soundtrack change: Kurthulmak's Theme

As soon as Meepo takes one step beyond the obelisks, he suddenly feels a sense of belonging, just like in the days when he was still a pup, as if this place, which he had witnessed only briefly in the past of another universe, was his one and only home. As he examined the fine workings of the mine, and the many petitioner kobolds that occupied it, the voice of Kurthulmak reached his ears.

You are Meepo Copperscale, the one called The Fortunate. You are one of my people, yet I never ordained you, nor have ever granted you magic except for earlier today. You fit all the descriptions of a priest of my faith, and yet I do not know you. What manner of being are you? Where did you come from?

This Kurthulmak sounds just like the other one.

[Nick]

Unshed tears of joy and warmth shone in Meepo's eyes as he enters the mine, getting down on one knees took some effort, but kneel he still did. He is indeed home...

It takes much effort however to remain professional in tone as Meepo recounts his life, his warren, his world and his encounters as fluently as any kobold historians could in the same proud and rich oral tradition. After which Meepo recounts his encounter with three other chosen ones and the battles that led him to his destination here.

And particularly, the proud tears brimming in his soft glowing turquoise eyes begin to flow as Meepo recounts the discovery of Darastrixhurthi in his world, and the threat of Bahamut and Tiamat's rivalry would bring to the just newly rediscovered ancestral home, and how the High Priest in his world is struggling to keep the stalemate in check.

Next, anger and indignation growl from Meepo's throat as he tells of his encounter with Abigor and how he has delayed the giving of the answer, preferring to yield to Kurtulmak's authority and wisdom on the matter.

Lastly, taking the letter from his tunic pocket, he offers the contents and what he knows about the Reality gate and cross-universe potential to his Lord, with the final word that he serves Kurtulmak of his world, but in his heart, Kurtulmak of any universe is as good as any.

[Mister_Sinister]

When Meepo concludes his tale, there is a long moment of silence. Not even the petitioners move or do anything for what seems like an eternity. At last, Kurthulmak's voice can be heard again, sounding with something close to awe.

I know that what you speak is true, however unbelieveable. Your Abigor situation is difficult to resolve - while I am more powerful than him, my demesne is still on loan from Bel, and thus, I can do little to assist you here. I can, of course, send you directly back to the place you came from, but you will earn the eternal enmity of Avernus by doing so, and Abigor takes personal insults very personally.

As far as your alliance is concerned, I will need time to think through everything you have told me. This changes many things, and many of my understandings of myself and the others here. That Darastrixhurthi still exists brings joy to my heart, but the idea that others like myself exist in other universes... is hard to swallow, even for a deity.

The Kurthulmak of your universe should be proud to have a priest such as yourself, Meepo Copperscale.

With these words, the petitioners resume their activities, bringing the merry sound of mining back into the demesne.

[Nick]

"He is proud, my Lord. Which is why he sent me, so that I can be of service to You." Meepo smiles with pride.

"My Lord, if I may be so bold. The Edge of Sanity is a multiversal threat that must be defeated by a force comprising of everybody in order to defeat and repel. 100 kobolds for the ability to travel in Avernus untouched would be a small prize to pay to ensure the survival of our race. We who serve, are always willing to die my Lord. And while it is uncomfortable to put it mildly, this alliance would also lead to a cooperation with the Gnomes. But such is the threat we are facing."

Taking a seat on the warm rocky mine floor, Meepo continues.

"As of now my Lord, You are the only one that I have told about the existence of this Reality Gate. The potential work that kobold-kind can do when You meet up with others of You would explode exponentially! As for the 100 kobolds. I do not wish to upstage Kurik's authority by taking 100 of his...kobolds, and I know that the kobolds under his dominion are doing well of sorts. Perhaps a hundred petitioners would have a higher potential of surviving the nine years and return. Would you agree my Lord?"

[Mister_Sinister]

Again, a silence falls, but the petitioners do not cease their work.

Agreed. One hundred petitioners shall accompany you out. I do realise the importance of this alliance, and desire greatly to find more of my people, but these things take time, and must be thought through properly. I cannot commit to something before I consult the deities with whom I am in alliance, and call upon my high priests and champions, informing them of this. There is a lot I am responsible for, and I cannot make decisions this quickly, even in such urgent matters. I'm sorry.

[Nick]

Getting up. Meepo gives a deep bow. "My Lord, this information about the Reality Gate is solely yours, and it would serve our kind and agenda that it should be kept that way. And it is about time for me to leave. May I be bold to request for any aid of any kind that you see fit to supply me with before I leave, and one of them damn visas. And if it may please you, to ordain me as one of your priests of faith in this world."

Thinking for awhile, Meepo speaks again. "My Lord, do you forsee an encounter between myself and Kurick?"

[Mister_Sinister]

At the mention of Kurik's name, all of the petitioners around you stop their work briefly, bringing the surprising silence to the mine once again. However, they resume almost immediately afterward.

Kurik is... Belial's prisoner. The kobolds that serve him do so through vassalage, as his release is conditioned on their service. He has been such a prisoner for many generations now, and despite all of my efforts, Belial has yet to release him or even give a term as to such. Thus, I feel a confrontation between you two is highly unlikely - his followers and yours, however...

Kurthulmak's voice fades off a little, giving a slight pause, before continuing.

You will get one hundred petitioners to give as conscripts to the Blood War, as promised. I will give you what other aid I can, but I am a busy god, and there is only so much I have to work with, and many of my children to aid. The visa is something only Bel or his generals can provide, but hopefully, with these petitioners at your side, this will be easier. Lastly, on the matter of your ordination, if my equivalent in another universe saw fit to ordain you, I don't see a need to question his decision.

Now, please go. I have much to consider.

With those words, all the nearby petitioner kobolds put down their tools, and approach to stand by Meepo's side. Even though the mine is quite spacious, they form a very large, trailing line going back deep into the mine. Despite their numbers, they are extremely organized in their formation, as if they had already received military training, and although they bore no weapons, they had a determination in their eyes that made them already seem like soldiers.

[Nick]

Meepo nods at the voice and bows humbly before the 100 petitioners.

"I know I am asking too much, I know this 9 years will be a trip that few could return, but on behalf of those who yet still live, your sacrifice from beyond the grave will be etched into my heart. Follow me."

Stepping out of the entrance, Meepo addresses the open Hellish sky.

"Supreme General of Avernus Abigor, Here are one hundred of my people that will serve for nine years in the Blood War in return for nine years of free safe passage that is officially endorsed and legal. What say you?"

[Mister_Sinister]

Ah, the bitch of Belial returns. Tell me, is Rosier still pegging you up the ass? Or maybe Fierana would like to fuck your scrawny shithole till it bleeds?

Abigor pauses slightly, seemingly examining the petitioner army Meepo brought to him.

At least you're capable of THAT much, whorefucker. Nine years' free pass to Avernus, as I promised. Just don't aggravate me, or I'll piss on your corpse, fuck your mother, then piss on her corpse, and fuck both of your corpses.

ALRIGHT YOU SHITTY MOTHERFUCKERS, GET IN LINE! THIS IS WAR, SOLDIERS, AND BY ASMODEUS, YOU WILL FIGHT IT! GET IN ORDER, GET YOUR WEAPONS, AND GET TO THE FRONT! ANY RETREATERS WILL BE CAST INTO THE LAKE OF FIRE!

Abigor continues yelling, and the petitioners, despite looking bewildered, can do nothing but comply. Meepo blocks out the sound of Abigor's voice, mostly out of relief.

[Nick]

With both elation and dread, hopes and fears, Meepo returns to the Age. Walking out of the portal, he finds Diesel waiting patiently as the animal raises its nose to sniff the air. Smiling, Meepo shakes off any soot that might have fell on him and rubs his palms on the weasel's nose. Once scent recognition has been established, Meepo hops onto the creature's waiting back and gallops back to base camp.