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Kuroimaken
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« Reply #300 on: December 28, 2010, 09:43:43 PM » |
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I wish I was the real Santa Claus, the same way as in The Santa Clause.
Wish granted. You were the real Santa Claus, until being pushed off a roof by altpersona so he can use the powers of Christmas to conquer BG. To stop him, I wish for a team of teenagers with attitude. Your wish is granted. Sadly, it's a team of teenagers with attitude as envisioned by Disney, who also decided to remake Captain Planet and the Planeteers. On that note, I wish Charles Darwin were still around, invulnerable, and armed with a chainsaw of natural selection that runs off of mankind's stupidity. |
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Monotremeancer
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« Reply #301 on: December 30, 2010, 06:43:22 PM » |
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Wish granted, the chainsaw gains an infinite speed and due to that an infinite mass. The Earth gets sucked into a huge black hole...
I wish you all a happy new year
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Who cares for realism when you can be awesome?
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Nanshork
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« Reply #302 on: December 30, 2010, 10:13:20 PM » |
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Wish granted, the chainsaw gains an infinite speed and due to that an infinite mass. The Earth gets sucked into a huge black hole...
I wish you all a happy new year
Wish granted, we all have a great new year because we steal everything you own and share it amongst the rest of us. I wish I had someone to hang out with that wasn't crazy or an ex-girlfriend of mine. |
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Kuroimaken
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« Reply #303 on: December 31, 2010, 10:04:16 AM » |
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Wish granted, the chainsaw gains an infinite speed and due to that an infinite mass. The Earth gets sucked into a huge black hole...
I wish you all a happy new year
Wish granted, we all have a great new year because we steal everything you own and share it amongst the rest of us. I wish I had someone to hang out with that wasn't crazy or an ex-girlfriend of mine. Wish granted, but unfortunately, that still leaves the annoying, the obnoxious, the depressed, the emos, and the transexuals, and they all want to hang out with you at the same time. I wish I weren't fat. |
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Monotremeancer
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« Reply #304 on: December 31, 2010, 11:51:35 AM » |
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Wish granted, you are now semi-bulimic, meaning you do a lot of eating, but no puking.
I wish I could find a reason to use the fish-shaking smiley over at DeviantArt
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Who cares for realism when you can be awesome?
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RobbyPants
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« Reply #305 on: January 13, 2011, 07:37:50 AM » |
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Wish granted! You post it in the perfect thread, but you make the mistake of hotlinking it instead of saving it, and when the user later pulls it down that day, nobody in the thread gets to see the awesome that was the fish-shaking smiley.
I wish I could do 100 push-ups in a row.
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My balancing 3.5 compendiumElemental mage test gameQuotesIt is a shame stupidity isn't painful. Totally true. Historians believe that most past civilizations would have endured for centuries longer if they had successfully determined Batman's alignment. Why are so many posts on the board the equivalent of " Dear Dr. Crotch, I keep punching myself in the crotch, and my groin hurts... what should I do? How can I make my groin stop hurting?" I suggest carving "Don't be a dick" into him with a knife. A dull, rusty knife. A dull, rusty, bent, flaming knife. Fluffy: It's over Steve! I've got the high ground!
Steve: You underestimate my power!
Fluffy: Don't try it, Steve!
Steve: *charges*
Fluffy: *three critical strikes*
Steve: **** I don't even stat out commoners. Commoner = corpse that just isn't a zombie. Yet. When I think "Old Testament Boots of Peace" I think of a paladin curb-stomping an orc and screaming "Your death brings peace to this land!" Buy a small country. Or Pelor. Both are good investments.
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Kuroimaken
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« Reply #306 on: January 13, 2011, 08:14:58 AM » |
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Wish granted! You post it in the perfect thread, but you make the mistake of hotlinking it instead of saving it, and when the user later pulls it down that day, nobody in the thread gets to see the awesome that was the fish-shaking smiley.
I wish I could do 100 push-ups in a row.
Wish granted. Your arm, sadly, grows to such horrific proportions that you are now unable to reach behind yourself to wipe your bum. I wish I could harness my awesome into a profitable activity. |
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Prime32
Honorary Moderator
Organ Grinder
Posts: 7534
Modding since 03/12/10
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« Reply #307 on: January 13, 2011, 09:20:38 AM » |
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I wish I could harness my awesome into a profitable activity. Wish granted. You permanently become a biological component of a revolutionary new reactor which has no emissions and can power the entire world indefinitely, your limbs and part of your brain removed to reduce maintenance. This is highly profitable for its inventor, the Brazilian president, who is awarded multiple Nobel Prizes. A year later, members of your family are kidnapped by agents of other countries, similarly processed and used to power superweapons. The existence of these weapons soon provokes a war of unprecedented proportions which leads to the death of everyone on earth... except you. Having become immortal, you are trapped inside the reactor until the end of the universe. I wish for a pair of sunglasses. |
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« Last Edit: January 13, 2011, 09:46:47 AM by Prime32 »
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My workDeviantArtCurrent gamesThe tier system in a nutshell: Tier 6: A cartographer. Tier 5: An expert cartographer or a decent marksman. Tier 4: An expert marksman. Tier 3: An expert marksman, cartographer and chef who can tie strong knots and is trained in hostage negotiation or a marksman so good he can shoot down every bullet fired by a minigun while armed with a rusted single-shot pistol that veers to the left. Tier 2: Someone with teleportation, mind control, time manipulation, intangibility, the ability to turn into an exact duplicate of anything, or the ability to see into the future with perfect accuracy. Tier 1: Someone with teleportation, mind control, time manipulation, intangibility, the ability to turn into an exact duplicate of anything and the ability to see into the future with perfect accuracy.
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Kuroimaken
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« Reply #308 on: January 13, 2011, 09:40:36 AM » |
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I wish I could harness my awesome into a profitable activity. Wish granted. You permanently become a biological component of a revolutionary new reactor which has no emissions and can power the entire world indefinitely, your limbs and part of your brain removed to reduce maintenance. This is highly profitable for its inventor, the Brazilian president, who is awarded multiple Nobel Prizes. A year later, members of your family are kidnapped by agents of other countries, similarly processed and used as to power superweapons. The existence of these weapons soon provokes a war of unprecedented proportions which leads to the death of everyone on earth... except you. Having become immortal, you are trapped inside the reactor until the end of the universe. I wish for a pair of sunglasses. ...wow. Went all-out for that one, didn't you? I would find it more likely that the Brazillian president of the time screw it up. I'd probably also develop mind powers at some point so I could rip myself off it. |
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Prime32
Honorary Moderator
Organ Grinder
Posts: 7534
Modding since 03/12/10
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« Reply #309 on: January 13, 2011, 09:45:58 AM » |
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...wow. Went all-out for that one, didn't you? This is what happens after a Franken Fran Archive Binge. |
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My workDeviantArtCurrent gamesThe tier system in a nutshell: Tier 6: A cartographer. Tier 5: An expert cartographer or a decent marksman. Tier 4: An expert marksman. Tier 3: An expert marksman, cartographer and chef who can tie strong knots and is trained in hostage negotiation or a marksman so good he can shoot down every bullet fired by a minigun while armed with a rusted single-shot pistol that veers to the left. Tier 2: Someone with teleportation, mind control, time manipulation, intangibility, the ability to turn into an exact duplicate of anything, or the ability to see into the future with perfect accuracy. Tier 1: Someone with teleportation, mind control, time manipulation, intangibility, the ability to turn into an exact duplicate of anything and the ability to see into the future with perfect accuracy.
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RobbyPants
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« Reply #310 on: January 13, 2011, 10:52:52 AM » |
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Granted. You get your pair of sunglasses... then Goro punches your face and ruins them. Bastard!
I wish I could throw harpoons like scorpion and pull people around with relative ease and yell "Get over here!" like a total badass.
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My balancing 3.5 compendiumElemental mage test gameQuotesIt is a shame stupidity isn't painful. Totally true. Historians believe that most past civilizations would have endured for centuries longer if they had successfully determined Batman's alignment. Why are so many posts on the board the equivalent of " Dear Dr. Crotch, I keep punching myself in the crotch, and my groin hurts... what should I do? How can I make my groin stop hurting?" I suggest carving "Don't be a dick" into him with a knife. A dull, rusty knife. A dull, rusty, bent, flaming knife. Fluffy: It's over Steve! I've got the high ground!
Steve: You underestimate my power!
Fluffy: Don't try it, Steve!
Steve: *charges*
Fluffy: *three critical strikes*
Steve: **** I don't even stat out commoners. Commoner = corpse that just isn't a zombie. Yet. When I think "Old Testament Boots of Peace" I think of a paladin curb-stomping an orc and screaming "Your death brings peace to this land!" Buy a small country. Or Pelor. Both are good investments.
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Mixster
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« Reply #311 on: January 13, 2011, 11:03:28 AM » |
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Granted you are now a bad, harpoon toting donkey.
I wish that I could fly.
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Monks are pretty much the best designed class ever.
JaronK
Meep Meep - Mixster out |
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konner09
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« Reply #312 on: January 13, 2011, 11:28:15 AM » |
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Granted you are now a bad, harpoon toting donkey.
I wish that I could fly.
WIsh Granted but unfortunetly you get caught in a turbine. I wish for a shoelace |
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I became insane, with long intervals of horrible sanity. - edgar allen poe
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Sohala
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« Reply #313 on: January 13, 2011, 01:12:46 PM » |
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Granted, now only if you could find a second one, then you could tie your, non Velcro, non slip on, shoes.
I wish for more snow across the US.
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"You think I'm talking about breaking the rules?" "No I'm just trying to figure out how far you want them bent." |
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PlzBreakMyCampaign
Hong Kong
Posts: 1373
Immune to Critical Hits as a Fairness Elemental
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« Reply #314 on: March 22, 2011, 06:56:24 PM » |
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Your wish is granted. Local reporters find that it is your wish that is the direct cause of a slight global downturn of temperatures. Al Gore hunts you down and shoots you in a rage.
If I had to wish for only one change, I wish everyone to be as wise as me.
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An interesting read, nice to see a civil discussion The point of Spell Resistance is to make it harder to get buffed. And healed. Don't forget that. Huge amounts of people are fuckwits. That doesn't mean that fuckwit is a valid lifestyle. Old Geezer's Law of Hobby Taste: The more objectively inconsequential a hobby is, the more disagreements within the community will be expressed in outrageously insulting, overblown, and ludicrously emotionally laden terms. More Funny than HumbleYour a shifter... you have all you ever need. It blows MoMF out of the water But if your greedy for more [ Wish] for something that only effects you, like another class level or two that doesn't count against your ECL. Yes, I'm the 3.0 "Masters of the Wild" shifter, the awesome kind. My favorite form to take is Force Dragon. Yes, I am immortal ... My character is hands down the coolest guy in the campaign and there is nothing I could possibly want. PBMC gets a cookie for DotA r |
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Vinom
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« Reply #315 on: March 22, 2011, 08:58:27 PM » |
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Your wish is granted, you and everyone else is rendered as wise as a drunk spider monkey.
I wish that I had sandwich.
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konner09
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« Reply #316 on: March 23, 2011, 03:04:11 AM » |
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Wish granted you have a sandwich the best tasting sandwich ever, but when the sandwich is fineshed you are stuck in a room playing disney music at 350 decibals on a infinite loop.
I wish for a nividia Geforce 550
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I became insane, with long intervals of horrible sanity. - edgar allen poe
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Vinom
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« Reply #317 on: March 23, 2011, 03:19:56 AM » |
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Wish granted, you have achieved enlightenment at five hundred fifty times earth's gravity, and are mostly flattened into something not unlike week old vomit.
I wish I was out of this room.
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Nox_Noctis
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« Reply #318 on: March 26, 2011, 07:05:59 PM » |
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Wish granted! You are in the molten core of the Earth -- taking a test you haven't studied for -- in your underwear!
I wish I had a delicious pizza.
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Kuroimaken
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« Reply #319 on: March 26, 2011, 07:58:50 PM » |
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Wish granted! You are in the molten core of the Earth -- taking a test you haven't studied for -- in your underwear!
I wish I had a delicious pizza.
That sounds like a trivial task. Wish granted. Unfortunately, it's made delicious by a poison that turns your white blood cells into rabid gerbils intent on devouring your intestines and genitals from the inside. Their saliva contains a substance that accelerates your perception to a ridiculously high ratio, so you feel like your body hasn't died for an entire century despite it only taking a few seconds. I wish I were a girl. (Twist THIS one!) |
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