I generally don't bother revising the poetry I write. Should I ever try and publish it, that would change, of course. Mine is generally dark in tone, as is most of the works I've done. Just happens that's where what little talent I have lies.
I like it. Most of my poetry is rather "dark" or "bleak" as well, with a few tinged with some note of persevering hope within the world. It comes much more easily than "happy" poetry, in my opinion.
Anyway, I'm glad people are actually posting (one of my friends started something like this on Facebook and it failed horribly).
Here's another one of mine (an acrostic):
Only he can know
Now that he has fallen
With which we are all born
Not meant for this world
Gouges out his soul
Erupting in a flash of misery
Despair consumes him
And he falls into darkness
Never to return
Grasping for the light
Enduring his humanity
Longing to return
My English teacher in my Senior year suggested that I revise it for a contest and make it something other than acrostic. I tried that and hated the result. It felt cheap, like the meaning was stripped away, leaving it a bare mesh of senseless words. When I changed it around so that it didn't start with the letters of One-Winged Angel, it seemed less potent. I think I picked the right words the first time. They're jarring and cruel words. They're very absolute in a negative sense (only, indefinite, never, grasping, enduring, longing).
And, yes, it is, in part, a reference to Satan of Biblical writing. I also feel that it draws a close relation between Satan and mankind (which was my intent, to invoke a sort of pity and disgust at the forces responsible for ejecting this being, who only wants to find home [a very innocent ideal]).